The idea is, correct me if I'm wrong, that the no-hands dude is on the bike path. My commenters are on Maple Street - where it's safe.
My feeling is that the no-hands dude's cousin - the guy who got him started on cheap beer and smokeless tobacco - is driving his sweet old GMC one-handed on Maple as I type. He's just caught his on-again, off-again honey text-messaging the counter guy at Advance Auto Parts.
The cousin's boss said that if he clocks in late just once more, he's outta there. He's late now.
I'll wave at you guys from the bike path - keeping the other hand safely on my handlebar.